California Proposition 8

I got onto Face­book today, because even though I told one of my friends that it was not addic­ting, I so am!

Any­way, my dad had writ­ten a very elo­quent note regar­ding Pro­po­si­tion 8 and why he will be voting NO on this pro­po­si­tion.  With is OK, I’ve deci­ded to dupli­cate his note here on my blog.  I couldn’t agree more with his words.

I urge you to think deeply about this issue as you head to the polls in the next few weeks.

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I rea­lize dif­fe­rent peo­ple have dif­fe­rent posi­tions on Prop 8, but con­si­der these thoughts. Far-right con­ser­va­ti­ves often deride what they con­si­der a trend toward govern­ment fos­te­ring a nanny state — where govern­ment pokes its nose into those areas of our lives that should right­fully belong to us alone. None of us likes anyone or any orga­ni­za­tion loo­king over our shoul­ders and telling us what we must or can’t do, par­ti­cu­larly when those things don’t directly impact others.

Yet when it comes to den­ying the right of same sex cou­ples to marry, those same con­ser­va­ti­ves don’t have any pro­blem enfor­cing their own moral con­vic­tions on the per­so­nal beha­vior of others. In my opi­nion, this is a clear con­tra­dic­tion. What many for­get is that today, con­ser­va­ti­ves may suc­cess­fully force others to behave accor­ding to the moral or reli­gious con­vic­tions of con­ser­va­ti­ves. But tomo­rrow, others may return the favor, and then you will hear howls of righ­teous protest.

Of course I ack­now­ledge the right of society to draw cer­tain lines, but doesn’t it make more sense, when con­si­de­ring beha­viors that are strictly per­so­nal, to allow each indi­vi­dual to make those choi­ces that seem right to him or her? Isn’t it wiser for us to live our lives as well as we know how, and to change the per­so­nal choi­ces and beha­viors of others through gentle per­sua­sion, rather than by using the ham­mer of the law?

The issue is big­ger than same sex marriage. It’s about per­so­nal free­dom. I’m urging a No vote on Prop 8.

8 Comments

  1. Jeff K. said,

    October 23, 2008 @ 2:53 pm

    This cha­rac­te­ri­za­tion of “Far-right con­ser­va­ti­ves” neither unders­tands con­ser­va­tive sup­port of Prop 8 or our unders­tan­ding of the nature of govern­ment. By crea­ting and dis­mis­sing a straw man argu­ment, you have neither con­si­de­red nor addres­sed the actual views of those who rea­so­nably sup­port Prop 8.

  2. Cory W said,

    October 26, 2008 @ 10:53 am

    Pro­po­si­tion 8 is defi­ni­tely a dif­fi­cult issue that has various effects and impli­ca­tions. The first thing that worries me is the gro­wing num­ber of so-called “rights” that seem to be crop­ping up in society. Is marriage really a right? Is post-secondary edu­ca­tion a right? What about health care? I think that our society is moving toward ena­bling and entit­ling its citi­zens, and the­reby rob­bing them of the oppor­tu­nity to earn the pri­ve­ledge of suc­cess, self-sufficiency and independence.

    Is marriage really something that should be regua­la­ted by the state? It could be argued that marriage is a strictly moral issue and if so, I think that having the state invol­ved inter­fe­res with the line bet­ween church and state that our foun­ding fathers put in place to pro­vide its citi­zens with free­dom of reli­gion, which by the way was the rea­son the pil­grims came here. I am extre­mely con­cer­ned that equa­ting same-sex unions to marriage then sets in motion the requi­re­ments of the state to enforce this. When this is then imple­men­ted in schools and courts, and when peo­ple are denied their right to their beliefs, we have one free­dom tram­pling upon another.

    I think that marriage has been cul­tu­rally defi­ned for thou­sands of years as bet­ween a man and a woman. It is also the opti­mal ins­ti­tu­tion for rai­sing chil­dren and for a healthy society. I think that homo­se­xuals should have rights and I think that the state already pro­vi­des those through other laws. Unless the state deci­des to get out of the marriage busi­ness alto­gether, I think that loss of free­dom of reli­gion is much too great if Pro­po­si­tion 8 fails.

  3. Jeff King said,

    October 26, 2008 @ 1:22 pm

    In one res­pect, I agree. I also think the state should get out of the busi­ness of marriage. Marriage, in my opi­nion, is a rela­tionship that should be sanc­tio­ned by reli­gious or other non-governmental orga­ni­za­tions. The government’s inte­rests are pri­ma­rily con­trac­tual and would be well ser­ved with some ver­sion of a domes­tic part­nership agree­ment. Howe­ver, that’s not the state of the law today. Let’s work together to make it so.

    Many sup­por­ters of Pro­po­si­tion 8 argue that the current law tram­ples their rights. What rights? No indi­vi­dual has the right to expect the law to mirror their per­so­nal beliefs. Laws reflect the con­sen­sus of society, and as Ame­ri­cans we are obli­ga­ted to obey those laws. To argue other­wise is to deny the foun­da­tio­nal prin­ci­ple of democracy.

    Howe­ver, Prop 8 sup­por­ters should be encou­ra­ged. Con­trary to their claims, the govern­ment can never deny anyone the right to their beliefs. We can always believe wha­te­ver we want – but we still have to obey the law. That prin­ci­ple is as old as civi­li­za­tion. Obe­dience to the law, even if we don’t agree with it, is the com­mon com­mit­ment that allows for a civil and orga­ni­zed society.

    There are still peo­ple in Ame­rica who think blacks, or women, or Jews, or gays, should be denied cer­tain bene­fits of citi­zenship that are gua­ran­teed by law. Tough. They can believe wha­te­ver they want, but they can’t act without con­se­quence if the law for­bids disc­ri­mi­na­tion based upon those beliefs. The bot­tom line is that it’s not OK to break the law even if our per­so­nal beliefs are in con­flict with that law. Anarchy would reign if it were otherwise.

    I find the last point of the wri­ter con­fu­sing. Allo­wing same-sex marriage does not result in loss of free­dom of reli­gion, unless one assu­mes that the right to unlaw­fully disc­ri­mi­nate against others falls under the umbre­lla of free­dom of reli­gion. Perhaps it used to, perhaps it will, but it’s doesn’t at this moment in time. The good news is that reli­gious orga­ni­za­tions that choose to do so will pro­bably be able to con­ti­nue teaching and prac­ti­cing disc­ri­mi­na­tion and only risk the loss of their fede­ral and state tax-exempt sta­tus. That seems like a small price to pay for follo­wing one’s conscience.

    On an only slightly rela­ted topic, I agree that a small part of the pro-Prop 8 fer­vor is about main­tai­ning the sanc­tity of the family. But I think a big­ger part reflects the vis­ce­ral dis­gust cer­tain reli­gious peo­ple feel when thin­king about “unna­tu­ral” homo­se­xual beha­viors. If I am correct, the issue of sanc­tity of marriage is, to a large degree, a straw man. If this were not so, wouldn’t the stri­dent sup­por­ters of Prop 8 be spen­ding much less time trying to ensure its defeat and much more time trying to pass laws for­bid­ding divorce?

  4. I voted!! Errr… At least I tried. » Smiling Mom said,

    October 26, 2008 @ 1:25 pm

    […] other day I filled out my per­ma­nent absen­tee ballot.  I’ve not been alto­gether quiet about my poli­ti­cal views in this […]

  5. Steve D. said,

    October 26, 2008 @ 1:33 pm

    It is unfor­tu­nate that the side of the mat­ter pro­noun­ced so elo­quently by com­men­ter #2 above led to the conc­lu­sion that fede­ral govern­ment should recuse them­sel­ves from invol­ve­ment in family mat­ters. The fact is, that’s exactly what those who vote “no” on pro­po­si­tion 8 are trying to do. We should have equal rights under the law for those who have expres­sed their love and devo­tion through marriage.

    Let’s say, hypothe­ti­cally spea­king, the situa­tion was rever­sed. Let’s say, that in our society, marriage was only per­mit­ted bet­ween indi­vi­duals of the same sex. Along those lines, indi­vi­duals who are wed have rights A, B, and C. Now, let’s say, hypothe­ti­cally, you are gay. You love your part­ner. You want to express your com­mit­ment to your part­ner, but the law only allows you to do this in a civil union. As part of a civil union, you only have rights A and B. You would like to have the right of C, but you can­not because syman­ti­cally you are not married.

    Now, if you were in this situa­tion, wouldn’t you want to have those equal rights under the law? Wouldn’t you fight for those rights, regard­less of the syman­tics of the word marriage?

    Let churches and reli­gious groups decide if they will recog­nize marria­ges bet­ween same-sex cou­ples. Do not let the govern­ment make that ethi­cal deci­sion based upon the mora­lity of others.

  6. Cory W said,

    October 26, 2008 @ 9:30 pm

    I think that there are seve­ral things that ever­yone in this con­ver­sa­tion agrees on, first, no group or per­son has the right to disc­ri­mi­nate against another for their beliefs, color, sexual orien­ta­tion, etc. I also think that we are both worried about the same thing, that the govern­ment will faci­li­tate the disc­ri­mi­na­tion of a group of peo­ple based on the laws of the land. We just dif­fer in which par­ties we fear risk discrimination.

    I also agree and think that it is unfor­tu­nate that some of the Pro­po­si­tion 8 sup­por­ters are not trying to pro­tect the sanc­tity of the family, but are sup­por­ting the pro­po­si­tion because of anti-gay sen­ti­ments, even hatred in some cases. That is something that I don’t unders­tand, the need to add hatred to the debate. I per­so­nally have had my Yes on 8 signs sto­len off of my pro­perty and had them rip­ped up into pie­ces and left there. One of the youth at church had a lady get out of her car while he was waving a Yes sign on the cor­ner and cuss him out, push him down and rip his sign in half. I know that both sides feel strongly, but both sides damage their cau­ses and calls for tole­rance with their hate­ful acts. Whether this Pro­po­si­tion pas­ses, I hope that what both sides claim will be true, that nothing will hap­pen and the san­ci­tity of the family will remain uncha­llen­ged and unmolested.

  7. JB said,

    October 26, 2008 @ 10:35 pm

    This is now the third time I have weighed in on this very debate, so I will stick to the point I am trying to make.

    Most “Yes on 8″ sup­por­ters agree (and cer­tainly ever­yone here) that in an ideal world law would only govern in unions and not in marriage. That being said, let me pose this question:

    Why should someone who sup­ports this idea sup­port a change to our State’s Cons­ti­tu­tion that further engrains/defines marriage into law?

    I whole hear­tedly agree that we should main­tain a sepa­ra­tion of church and state, so injec­ting a reli­gious defi­ni­tion into law would be in direct conflict.

  8. Nette @ Smiling Mom said,

    October 27, 2008 @ 7:41 am

    Well, I actually agree with a por­tion of what Cory said:
    “That is something that I don’t unders­tand, the need to add hatred to the debate. I per­so­nally have had my Yes on 8 signs sto­len off of my pro­perty and had them rip­ped up into pie­ces and left there. One of the youth at church had a lady get out of her car while he was waving a Yes sign on the cor­ner and cuss him out, push him down and rip his sign in half. I know that both sides feel strongly, but both sides damage their cau­ses and calls for tole­rance with their hate­ful acts.”

    I recently read a series of emails on Face­book that were ini­tia­ted by a Yes on 8 sup­por­ter. He was wri­ting to the pre­si­dent of the Cali­for­nia Teachers Asso­cia­tion. He began his email chain like this:

    “From: Jeremy Wil­son
    Sent: Wed­nes­day, Octo­ber 22, 2008 08:47 PM Paci­fic Stan­dard Time
    To: Sanchez, David
    Subject:

    –hey numb­nutz. if you’ve got so much extra money sit­ting around, why
    don’t you actually try paying our teachers a living wage ins­tead of fun­ding
    your per­so­nal poli­ti­cal agenda with their union dues?

    sin­ce­rely,

    jeremy wil­son”

    It promp­ted a simi­lar res­ponse from the CTA pre­si­dent and was then ended with a simi­larly demea­ning final reply by Jeremy.

    I agree that both sides damage their stance with hate­ful & ugly acts or com­ments that do not stick to the issues, but attack those who believe dif­fe­rently than they do.

    That being said, I think that this con­ver­sa­tion has been exhaus­ted on my blog. Thank you for all your thought­ful com­ments and thoughts. Howe­ver at this point my com­ments are closed.

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